Kaosu Akihabara Sequel to Minna de WAHAHA!
by Kaori
Summary: Like the title says it's the sequel. Gundam Pilots get their revenge on the girls. Read the Minna de WAHAHA! to find out exactly why.
1. Kaosu Akihabara ~ Sequel to Minna de WAH...

WAHAHA! Here we go! I don't know if this is going to be as funny as the last one but I've had my sugar and I'm willing to go for maximum silliness here. It's the G-Girls turn! The song   
that inspired me was Team Manicure's Kaosu Akihabara ( @.@ Oro that song will make you insane) which is incredibly hyper and kawaii!  
  
Disclaimer: The Coconut Monkey drink belongs to PC Gamer and Coconut Monkey, I do not own Gundam Wing or its characters. This fic, however, is mine and I will defend it *waves   
tanbos*! Oh and the second drink mentioned is a nasty concoction one of my uncles (who is an avid drinker) threw together one night; and yes he did drink it.  
  
  
Kaosu Akihabara [sequel to Minna de WAHAHA]  
By Kaori  
  
  
It's been three weeks since the fiasco at the safehouse. Dorothy released the tapes to a television station on L3 thoroughly pissing off our favorite pilots; Milliardo and Noin seemed to   
get a kick out of the footage though. Anyhow…  
  
Four pilots were awakened to the sound of glass on a hardwood floor. Presently they were staying in a two story house, and the only hardwood floor was in the makeshift laboratory   
Heero had set up. "MAXWELL!" Wufei hollered, brandishing the infamous katana. "Open the door!" The door opened ever so slightly and Duo poked his head out. He was wearing a   
pair of safety goggles.  
  
"What are you doing, Duo?" Heero glared, last time the American had been in there he had nearly burned the house down. The braided baka's customary grin widened. He tossed each of   
them a pair of safety goggles and motioned for them to follow him. Befuddled, the four remaining pilots entered the lab.  
  
On the table between a beaker and a Bunsen burner was a large sponge cake. Duo was holding up two flasks that reeked of alcohol. "What is that?" Quatre held his nose because the   
smell was so overwhelming.  
  
"These Q-man, are the most dangerous drinks known to human science." He glanced significantly at Heero. "I think they were referred to as 'suicide drinks'."  
  
"What's in it?"  
  
"This one," Duo held up the flask in his left hand, "is a Coconut Monkey; pineapple juice, orange juice, Blue Curacao, Amaretto, tonic water, coconut milk, white rum, Absolut, tequila, gin,  
Jim Beam, and Midori."  
  
"And the other one?"  
  
"Ah, this one is Jamaican rum, brandy, Irish whiskey, and a whole lot of vodka."  
  
"What…exactly…are you planning to do?" Trowa asked hesitantly, not sure if he wanted to know.  
  
"Revenge my dear Trowa." Duo's voice had a semi-maniacal edge to it that made even the Perfect Soldier's blond run cold. "Shinigami must avenge himself on those who would dare make   
a mockery of him." He took out a large needle. "I'm going to inject this cake with these dear lovelies and send it to Relena's house." Horrified gasps erupted.  
  
"Duo that's just…EVIL!" Quatre was appalled. "You KNOW Relena has never even tasted alcohol."  
  
"All the more reason to do it." Duo said darkly.  
  
"Quatre's got a point though." Wufei noted. "As much as I dislike the onna, that's just a little too harsh and…what the hell am I saying…gimme that needle!" So without further discussion, the pilots bore the highly intoxicating pastry to Relena's mansion with a carefully written note on the box:  
  
  
Dear Ms. Relena,  
We wanted to thank you for your outstanding work in pacifism. We admire you so much that words cannot describe how much we are in awe of your strength of character. Please   
take this cake as a token of our esteem.  
  
  
  
Sincerely,  
The Relena Peacecraft Fan Club  
  
  
Kaori interrupts: You can just feel the sarcasm…  
Wufei: Onna! You're wrecking the story!  
Kaori: Leave me alone, I'm writing this fic, and I can put you in a bachelorette party and make you shimmy out of a cake naked if I felt like it.  
Wufei: O.O You wouldn't.  
Kaori: Try me justice boy.  
Quatre: Oi, oi can we please get back to the fic?  
Kaori: Very well…later for you Wufei.  
Wufei: *whimpers*  
  
  
Relena, was so flattered by the note that she didn't notice that the handwriting looked suspiciously like Quatre's. Being the generous, giving personality that she is, Relena invited Sally,   
Hilde, and Catherine to share the cake with her; Dorothy invited herself. The five girls greedily devoured the cake and ten seconds later…all hell broke loose…  
  
  
  
WAHAHA! Cliffhanger! I hate cliffhangers…but I figured it would be better to do this in two parts (besides, my sugar rush wore off…)  
  
  
To be continued, after I eat a few more ice cream sandwiches, and drink the rest of the root beer (my roommate is so gonna kill me).  



	2. Part Two: Enter Drunken Quintet

A thousand apologies for the cliffhanger, but I can't write without my sugar. Well…actually I COULD but I never have as much fun doing it; besides I NEED sugar to write something this insane. Anyway, if you're reading this you've probably read Minna de WAHAHA and Kaosu Akihabara part one already. If you haven't, I suggest you do so you don't get all confused and stuff.   
  
This picks up immediately where the last part left off. What are you waiting for *waves tanbos* read! Read!  
  
Singing Disclaimer (to the tune of "If You're Happy and You Know It): If you want to get some money don't sue me. If you want to get some money don't sue me. If you want to get some cash, it's not me you should harass, because I never said GW belonged to me.   
  
  
Kaosu Akihabara Episode Two: Enter the Drunken Quintet.  
By Kaori (who is on a major sugar rush @_@)  
  
  
Kaori [in cheesy announcer voice]: Last episode, the G-Girls have just eaten Duo's cake, and we are about to see the results. Let's just say things are going to get very interesting (God forgive me…).  
  
  
The room was filled with a thick pink smoke. When it cleared the girls had been transformed into the Drunken Quintet! Each girl was dressed in a gi with pink elephants all over it. Catherine, Hilde, and Relena's eyes narrowed while Dorothy and Sally were wide-eyed (pretty much the opposite of the what they're eyes are normally like). Relena struck a dramatic pose (think Power Rangers), "Drunken Quintet! To ze liquor store!!" she slurred.  
  
"Ikimashou (1)!" the other four chorused and they all dashed out the door. Little did they know that they were being followed by a miniature roving camera.  
  
"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!" Duo laughed evilly.  
  
"I don't understand what this is supposed to accomplish." Heero said. The pilots had returned to the safehouse and were watching the footage from Duo's special camera in the living room.  
  
"Watch and learn, Heero-man." Duo chuckled, as the screen showed that the Drunken Quintet had entered a liquor store in Roppongi (2).  
  
The clerk had just finished restocking the shelves when five women burst into the store. "Give ush yer sake or elsh!" Relena demanded.  
  
"Excuse me?" Sally rushed up and walloped the clerk with a trout (only Kami knows where she got it).  
  
"Do not queshtion the great Drunken Shtalker!"  
  
"Tenk you Drunken Doctor. Now you, give ush yer sake!" Relena/Drunken Stalker yelled, jumping on top of the countertop.  
  
"Look lady, don't make me call the cops."  
  
"You ashked fer it!" Drunken Stalker clapped her hands and the other girls immediately jumped on top of the poor clerk. They dressed him up in a pink tutu, tied him to a chair they pulled from hammerspace, and forced him to watch Barney, Teletubbies, Brittany Spears, and Fan Boy from Freakazoid! sing "The Song that Never Ends." As the store clerk screamed in horror, the girls looted the liquor store.  
  
"Man, that's harsh, I wish I'd thought of that." Duo commented, scribbling into a notebook. Heero grabbed it. On the cover it said "Ways to Torture and/or Annoy People - Volume 25."  
  
"…"  
  
Back in Roppongi, the Drunken Quintet was enjoying the spoils of their victory on the roof of what used to be the United States Embassy. "Oh no!" Dorothy squealed (after fifteen bottles of sake and nine bottles of gin).  
  
"What's wrong Drunken Nuisance?" Catherine asked, sipping on a bottle of very expensive absinthe. Dorothy/Drunken Nuisance (looking incredibly SD right now) whipped around and looked in the eyes.  
  
"We're out of liquor Drunken Clown!"  
  
"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!" All five girls howled.  
  
"Thish ish an injushtish!" (Oi I think she's beeen hanging around Wufei too long.) Drunken Doctor got up slowly so she wouldn't fall off the roof.  
  
"We must find more!" Drunken Stalker announced (once again striking a ridiculous pose). "Drunken Quintet! To another liquor shtore!" And they all bounced off.  
  
The five girls ran through the city in a drunken stupor looking for another liquor store when Hilde spotted something. "Stop girls!"  
  
"What is it Drunken Warrior?" Drunken Doctor peered over Hilde/Drunken Warrior's shoulder.  
  
"Look!" the other three went to see what the two were looking at. Their eyes went wide.  
  
"Chocolate!!!" they all cheered and rushed into the store.  
  
"Give ush all yer chocolate or elshe!" Drunken Stalker crowed.  
  
"What?" the lady behind the counter was confused.  
  
"You dare queshtion the Drunken Shtalker?" Drunken Nuisance gasped and smacked the poor cashier with a piece of stale French bread. "Take dat insolent shwine!"  
  
The Drunken Quintet ate every piece chocolate in the place and *POOF* transformed into chibis.  
  
Back at the safehouse, the boys were watching in horror as the chibified, drunk girls ran amuck through town. "Oh man, what have we done…" Duo moaned.  
  
"Quick, if we hurry maybe we can catch them before the cops do." Wufei said.  
  
"What do we do with them when we do catch them?" Trowa asked.  
  
"We'll think of something, let's go!" Heero grabbed Trowa by the collar and dragged him out the door.  
  
Meanwhile, the Chibi Drunken Quintet (who are now sugar high as well) was happily terrorizing the general populace. At the moment they were in a French clothing boutique playing dress-up and throwing the clothes unmercifully into the street. "Oooh! I want the red one!" Chibi Drunken Warrior squealed. The high pitched voices had the store's manager and clerks twitching in anguish.  
  
"Eww! This is icky!" Drunken Nuisance threw a purple dress with sequins on it out the door.  
  
"INJUSTICE!" a familiar voice howled from outside. The five Gundam pilots (each armed with a stun club and net like the one from Ape Escape) appeared in the doorway; Wufei with the purple dress on his head.  
  
"Interesting fashion statement Wu-man." Duo snickered.  
  
"Under normal circumstances I'd throttle you right here and now, but we have chibis to catch so I'll let it slide."  
  
"BE DA (3)!" the chibis put their pinkies up to their eyes and stuck out their tongues then ran off in separate directions.  
  
"Aw crap! Split up!" Heero said and the pilots rushed off in separate directions.  
  
  
Kaori: Okay I'm stopping there for right now I need a break, and more sugar.  
  
Duo: I need sugar too!!  
  
Kaori: Fine, POCKY FOR EVERYONE!  
  
Everybody: YAY!  
  
Kaori: Don't worry minna-san, I'll get the next part up soon.  
  
  
1) Ikimashou means "Let's go"  
  
2) Roppongi is a place in Tokyo.  
  
3) This is the equivalent of going nyeh nyeh nyeh nyeh nyeh. 


	3. Part Three: Chibi Hunt

Kaori: Oi! Ayamachi! Wake up, it's time to write part three of Kaosu Akihabara!  
  
Ayamachi: You've been at the chocolate again haven't you?  
  
Kaori: YES! *triumphantly waves tanbos* I'm celebrating earning my first green stripe, I'm entitled to a little chocolate.  
  
Ayamachi: You've eaten almost the entire drawer full…  
  
Kaori: Nobody asked you. On with the fic!  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing (surprise, surprise) suing me is not going to make any of us any richer, and the trial would be a waste of time so don't do it, 'kay?  
  
  
Kaosu Akihabara Part Three: Chibi Hunt  
By: Kaori (now at the rank of one green stripe)  
  
Ayamachi [cheesy announcer voice]: When we last left the G-boys they had found the now chibified Drunken Quintet and are now about to embark on the dreaded chibi hunt…  
  
Kaori interrupts: Out of consideration for those 1xR, 2xH, 3xC, 4xD, and 5xS haters, I am going to make this incredibly exasperating for the boys…hmm maybe that's not so considerate…ah well…  
  
  
The sun has set, and the chibis are still on the loose.  
  
Heero [dark warehouse]  
  
"Damn her…where did she go?" He searched for a light switch but doesn't find one  
  
"WAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Relena/ Chibi Drunken Stalker voice is made three times more irritating by the fact that she's drunk, sugar high, AND chibified. "You shall NEVER catch Chibi Drunken Stalker!"  
  
"Hmm…at least she seems to be sobering up a bit."  
  
WHIIIIIZZZZZZZZZ KAPOW! Heero is knocked in the face by a pulley on a rope. "RELENA NO BAKA! SHOW YOURSELF!"   
  
"Hmmm….let me think about that…No thanks."  
  
"Omae o korosu."  
  
"You sure say that a lot."  
  
"Relena…."  
  
"Not Relena, Chibi Drunken Stalker!"  
  
"Fine. Chibi Drunken Stalker, come out and let's talk about this like civilized people."  
  
"You're just trying to get me to come out and then make me go home. Well you're gonna have to catch me, Mr. Perfect Soldier."  
  
"Damn you! Come here!"  
  
WHACK! Heero is walloped with a two-by-four  
  
"All right, that does it…no more Mr. Nice Guy." Whips out night vision goggles from spandex-space and scans the warehouse.  
  
Ayamachi: Hold it! Hold it! Time out!  
  
Kaori: What's wrong?  
  
Ayamachi: Spandex-space?  
  
Kaori: Who's writing this, you or me?  
  
Ayamachi: You are but…  
  
Kaori: No buts! [whacks Ayamachi with tanbos] Time in!  
  
  
Duo [a mall; now empty because it's after hours]  
  
"Here chibi chibi chibi…" Hilde/Chibi Drunken Warrior pops up, scaring the bejeezus out of him. "AGH!"  
  
"You called?"  
  
"Come here you!" He tries to use the stun club on the chibi but misses. "Hold still!"  
  
"Ooh! Pretty!" Chibi Drunken Warrior grabs the stun club and makes like Darth Vader. "Duoooooo, I am your girrrlfrieeeeeeend!"  
  
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Chibi whacks him with the stun club causing him to loose consciousness.  
  
  
Trowa [abandoned amusement park]  
  
"…" Catherine/ Chibi Drunken Clown is standing on top of a horse on the merry-go-round and suddenly starts throwing rubber knives at him "Cathy…"  
  
"It's Chibi Drunken Clown now! And what are you complainin' about? I throw knives at you all the time!"  
  
"It's time to go home."  
  
"I don't want to."  
  
"…" [stun clubs here and stuffs her into the net] "That wasn't so hard." [starts to walk off but notices that the net feels unusually light] "???" [looks behind him]  
  
"Looking for someone?" Chibi Drunken Clown waves a sharp dagger in the air  
  
"I knew I forgot something…"  
  
  
Quatre and Wufei [Burger King]  
  
"You know we wouldn't be in this mess if you hadn't agreed to help Duo get back at the girls." Quatre and Wufei are tied to a chair, and Sally and Dorothy are having a ketchup vs mustard war.  
  
"How was I supposed to know those weak onnas couldn't hold their liquor?"  
  
"I seem to remember mentioning Relena's absence of a tolerence for alcohol."  
  
"Shut up and help me cut this rope!"  
  
"You two aren't going anywhere!" Dorothy/Chibi Drunken Nuisence crowed. "You cut that rope, and you'll be covered in boiling hot grease!"  
  
Ayamchi: Time out! How do you rig a vat to fall on someone when they cut a wound up rope?  
  
Kaori: Would you like me to demonstrate?  
  
Ayamachi: Errm..no that's okay.  
  
Kaori: Good. Time in!  
  
"You chibis will cause fear no more!" a voice said.  
  
"Who's there?" Sally/Chibi Drunken Doctor demanded.  
  
"I stand for love and justice!"  
  
"Sailor Moon?" Quatre asked hopefully.  
  
"No. I am Sailor Noin!!" *authoress and muse have a laughing fit at the sight of Noin in a fuku* "You two are so going to get it."  
  
Kaori: Just be glad I didn't turn you into a Power Ranger.  
  
"Good point." Noin crosses her palms in front of her "Noin Chibi Incarceration!"   
  
"NOOOOOOOOOO!!" The chibis are magically locked in a cat carrier.  
  
"YAY!" Quatre and Wufei rejoice  
  
Duo and Trowa [junk yard]  
  
"This is not good." Duo and Trowa are being lowered by crane into the car smasher.  
  
"…" Both Chibi Drunken Clown and Chibi Drunken Warrior are laughing evilly.  
  
"Hold it right there!" a deep voice commanded. The chibis gasp in horror.  
  
"Oh no! It's Tuxedo Trieze!"  
  
"Time to put an end to your evil!" Roses come flying out of Trieze's cape and pin the delinquent chibis to the ground.  
  
"Get us down!" Duo and Trowa scream.  
  
The group reunites at the safehouse with all the chibis safely secured. "How do we de-chibify them?" Quatre asked. Duo whips out the handy-dandy chibi manual.  
  
"Says here you give 'em a spoonful of castor oil." The five pilots look at each other, then at the chibis, and grin wickedly.  
  
"They've had a lot to drink though…" Trowa said. "Better give them…"  
  
"THE WHOLE BOTTLE!" the boys stuffed a funnel in each of the chibis mouths and poured down the contents of an extra large bottle of castor oil each down their little throats; all the while laughing maniacly.  
  
  
  
THE END!  
  
  
  
Kaori: *ahem* Now for the moment we've all been waiting for!  
  
Ayamachi: You are a very sick woman, isn't there something against this in the Cuong-Nhu manual?  
  
Kaori: The manual says nothing about bishounen.  
  
Ayamachi: @.@ Ororororororororororororororo….  
  
Kaori: While my muse zones out…BRING OUT THE CAKE!!  
  
[Kaori's Rottweilers, Floyd and Lily, come out pulling a giant five tiered cake]  
  
Kaori: Ladies…get out your money!  
  
[G-Boys pop out of the cake in their birthday suits and dance to funky music]  
  
Kaori: *drool* bai bai minna san! SHAKE THAT THANG!!  



End file.
